i start the day by getting caught up here, then go over to the positive expectation video poker machines and lose $200 fairly quickly. i would try to win it back right away, but I've got some time before dinner/britney, and a rental car, so i grab a (free) catfish lunch at the el cortez and then head to hoover dam.
in the old days the dam was about an hour from vegas, but henderson (home of the robot) has grown so huge it's only about half an hour away.
lake mead from boulder city
truth in advertising (the sign's actually pointing at the dam here, but it's hard to make out -- joke's are funnier when they're more apparent)
new highway being built over the dam -- the support structure is finished, the roadway deck is coming in over the top.
close-up, including the world's scariest port-a-potties
i love how it looks like a model in black & white
parking structure for the dam
shot this blind (over my shoulder) as i was driving out
i had dinner reservations, as part of the britney package, at fin (in the mirage) at 18:00. i showed up about 15 minutes early, was quickly seated and served an outstanding meal.
bite-sized duck appetizer -- not part of the menu, but rather a lagniappe
pork pot stickers
on the menu this was called "sweet and tangy pork" but what it really is is hot-and-sweet. at hunan home's (sic) this would be called "orange pork." it was very very good, but a little on the fatty side -- i probably left a third of the overall mass here on the plate.
banana fritters with sweet vanilla cream and raspberries
service was spectacular, the food very good. a guy sitting behind me clearly hadn't had a lot of chinese food, but lost it during this meal ... repeatedly saying, very loudly, "THIS IS THE BEST MEAL I'VE EVER HAD IN MY LIFE!"
dessert included a homemade fortune cookie and what my waiter called "a liquid fortune cookie" (which actually was a bailey's concoction that tasted very close to coquitos).
i had an hour and a half to make my way to mandalay bay and take my seat.
the stadium is less than half full when the first act starts. the audience goes crazy because they haven't figured out yet that this would be one of two opening acts and not britney herself.
kristinia debarge opened. some small spinner that is frighteningly reminiscent of teena marie. so did two songs "sabotage" and her hit "goodbye" (the song that takes it's main riff from the old one-hit-wonder steam song). her dad founded debarge and i can tell you, very definitively, that she is not as good as her dad's band (and they were a suck band). this girl suffers severely by singing live and not having post-production. best thing about her act was she did two songs then got the hell off the stage.
next up, jordin sparks. she was a winner on american idol, a show that i've never seen (and know only because of wikipedia). think of her as a bad mockery of the later tina turner (which, just like elvis, is the wrong one to choose).
{side note: it's not politically correct to say it, but tina was better in the days that she was getting beaten by ike. don't believe me? compare this to this.)
her set lasted a few songs. then, mercifully, was over with no encore.
at the end of the second opener, two extremely drunk middle-aged women come and sit next to me. we strike up a conversation and they want to know how much i like their shoes that they bought at a store that they can't remember where they bought 'em but we're just here to get away from san diego and it seemed like seeing britney would be a hoot.
i point out that the woman with the black shoes has a reverse french pedicure and immediately get both hugged and drooled upon.
so i'm in good there and i'm pretty confident that neither of them will throw-up on me by choice.
no one has been using the entirety of the three ring platform, but i have little doubt that britney will make 'er. after several minutes' worth of wait, a notification came on on the wrap-around top screen.
smart. this keeps people from getting over-anxious, gives the fan base to go by merchandise, and lets the tension mount.
on zero there's a long rolling video filled with freak imagery and double-entendre -- the underlying concept is you're about ready not only to see a circus, but a freak show.
the start is, in fact, entirely circus -- in fact, it really is members of the big apple circus. there's lots of object manipulation (a guy that's good at manipulating a large cube frame bigger than he is) and a woman who is a master of being thrown on a plank.
and it's right here that things take a turn to the bizarre. a large trampoline is in the center of the stage and an acrobat come out to do some tricks ... and so does his partner, a woman with no legs. so let's see, we've got a crowd full of people, about 30% of which are teenage wannabes (or whatever britney-bes are called) and we've just thrown an amputee on a trampoline. i, myself, am loving it. bring it on, britney, you can't get too weird for me. but i can see all the mom's in the audience shooting glimpses at their daughters and wondering either "is this too much?" or "how much did i spend to see speds on tramps?" or possibly, "becky would look better with more blonde highlight in her hair."
but soon enough, out comes britney.
and this show is full-on choreography. start to finish. note for note. front to back. and they're using every square inch of space.
say what you want about britney spears, one thing is absolutely true, when she's on stage you can't take your eyes off her. she commands it, much in the same way madonna does.
we knock through all the expected hits as well as the obligatory stuff from her new album. her band, which is never announced (and not even on stage) are very tight. for sure, they're playing live. is britney lip synching? i have no idea and i don't care.
one good idea is they are not using the video wrap above merely to project britney, but instead are using it to enhance the experience.
(no notice was given to not use cameras -- you could shoot as much as you wanted.)
for me the great thing about the show was the psychological stance. she knows, understands and lives the fact that she's under heavy tabloid scrutiny. but rather than take the michael jackson stance of "why can't you leave me the hell alone?" hers is something more akin to "okay, how about this?" britney treats her inspection much like a super aggressive person handles a biting dog -- she doesn't run, she just pushes her hand further down its throat 'til it pukes.
i saw britney on her last go through vegas -- before she had shaved her head, etc. -- and she was great. i got to see disney britney, bondage britney, britney in the shower, laughing britney, dancing britney.
this was more along the lines of psychological britney. lots and lots of video imagery, personal self-reference and keen understanding of how everyone (fans and haters) view her from the outside. i thought it was all pretty damn daring. none of the britney bashers i know (you know who you are) could be anywhere as forthright in the way they feel about themselves -- or as aware of how other people thought about them.
the high points of the night were a super-dark and funky version of "hit me baby {one more time)" and an nearly dali-esque montage where a trophy deer head is scratching records DJ style.
at all times she was surrounded by at least a dozen dancers and often other circus people performing tricks as she played (she disappears a couple of times and gets sawed in half/cubed once).
tons and tons of sexual innuendo. this is not disney britney anymore. the mom with the daughter in front of me allowed an endless amount of dry humping and simulated fellatio, but made it a point to cover her daughter's eyes when madonna kissed britney on-screen. (the teenage girls behind me LOVED any lesbian reference and were repeatedly remarking how hot the women on stage were.)
digital zoom leaves this pic a bit wanting -- sorry about that
the stage carries an unbelievable level of danger. there are many open holes that people on things like unicycles are riding around, or dancers are bumping and grinding near. this is the last stop in north america for this tour, but i promise you, if this goes on for very long, someone will be hurt badly.
there was a gigantic amount of indoor fireworks at the end. enough that clouds enveloped the entire stadium (remember -- this is a city known for its hotel fires). i'm 100% serious when i say that no odor makes me happier than the smell of spent gunpowder, so i left euphoric.
i thought britney was great. hokey at times, cheesy at others. best when she just started pulling out the dare-me-to-cross-this-line stops. my only complaint was the show was on so much auto-play that there was no audience interaction of any kind over and above maybe two "how're you doin', vegassssssssss!?"
special K, you would have liked it.
better still, i figured out that if you parked at the mandalay convention center (attached to the event center), a 20 minute walk could save you a 90 minute wait in the parking garage.
i went downtown to take advantage of triple-points-til-midnight on an el cortez video poker machine, breaking dead even there, then moved over to blackjack to try and recoup my $200 loss. quickly i went another $100 down (betting 5's) then held even for a few hours. one of the signs i have that i'm getting tired is if a dealer can make a decision faster than i can -- regardless of their speed, dealers are never faster than i am.
when i'd hit the speed barrier, i called it quits. i thought i'd won about $300 on my last trip, but instead i'd won only $200 which now means i'm down $100 (including all expenses) on my combined trips to vegas. sure, that works out to only $25/day, but i'm still pissed about it. in my world gambling is strictly binary. you win or you lose. $1 up is infinitely better than $1 down and there's no difference between $1 down and 10,000.
i'm pissed enough, in fact, that i have considered (but now rejected), ending my AYCJ in vegas, winning my money back and then driving a rental (or catching a rideshare ride) back to fort lauderdale.
still, it was a good day. i'm glad i came.
NYC tomorrow for one night, then new orleans.
No comments:
Post a Comment